Quiteus !

And then I came to know frustration,tension has become an integral part of my life. Did u ever felt that u r not suited to live/or not applicable to live ?…I think "qualified" is a better term. i am living in a very ideal world, all my thoughts r so ideal that I cant bear ppl behaving so practically. Like m living a very bookish life where thr are chapters like “to be good to all”, “never hurt neone”.. .. I started expecting things like those from others too. But thr r too many 'out of syllabus' chapters coming while u live. Im not prepared for it n I cant cope with them . M not able to take up resposibility, im losing confidence that I can take good decisions, im holding on some believes that doent exists, living on some waste filosofies that looks good in books/blackboard only. Somewhere unconsiously thr is feeling of ending this all. Im bold enough to write it down :D . I boldly remember the thing that saneguruji attempted suicide when they realize that, this world is not suited for him. This is the thing I remember boldly rather than "Shyamchi Aai" or "Sadhana" of him. Same with Curt Cobain.. somewhere im feeeling the same sometime. I cant bear tension, I cant lie (means even if I do, I get caught or felt so bad.), I believe in ppl readily, I think all r good, I never hide anything, im not kinda person who get nething by hook or crook.. I belive in performance, I m idealist about my work, I don’t care wat ppl think of me but same time I m curious abt thr opinion. I want to be good to everyone..so on and long ideal list.. but many a times im wrong. I get involve in some person/relations very quickly. Ok enough.. the thing is I think im not qualified to live here.. but ...but if this is the end of this post it should not be..but I don’t like tragic end of film , posts , stories .. so the last statement is..if u r not qualified then its always better to learn and get qualification..though thr is not certification cource/institute which can give me qualification…I need to live and learn while living..